Skip to main content

Biopsy #2

12-27-07

I had an ultrasound on my lymph nodes today and a biopsy done. FYI - Biopsies suck. So today was a pretty crappy day, painful, uncomfortable etc. In fact, today was the first day that I had a scary realization, I am going to spend a ton of time in hospitals the next 6 - 8 months and most of that time I will be miserable. I did manage to make the doctor laugh. He was kind and was aware the last thing I wanted to do was have a second biopsy.

From the first one, I know that there will be a ton of soreness for at least a week, that I won't be able to drive my car (manual) and I can't really use my right hand, arm etc. (I am typing one handed, so dont judge my misspellingz). So, I told him that I had always been waiting for an opportunity to learn to write with my left hand. :)

I am still trying to be healthy and positive as much as possible. Most of the day I am full of peace and acceptance. After going to the hospital I cry. (Especially when they stick me with huge needles and leave holes in my body.) Right now I am tired and going to bed. Tomorrow I will wake up, and "keep on trucking".

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I made a choice.

So I have spent the past few weeks thinking.   Trying to nail down what is most important.  Trying to give myself some perspective.   So I have outlined my worst case scenarios.  Worst case scenario #1:  I don't have the surgery now and end up with cancer in the next few years.   Worst case scenario #2: I have the surgery now and a few years from now I am unhappy and upset that I never had my own biological children.   Worst case scenario #3: I have horrible menopausal symptoms for the next few years.   So. When I write them out.  I see something pretty clear.  #2 and #3 are temporary and there are options for me to work through.   #1 could equal death.  Which is pretty permanent.   So. I'm gonna do it.  That's how I feel right now.  I'm going to chose short term suffering to have a better long term life.   I am trying to read up on things I can do to mitigate menopause that ...
2 comments
Read more

Chemo #3

I had my third chemo session today. My friend Claire went with me. It's nice to have someone there; I dare say a partner in crime. Plus, since I am hooked to a machine, I get to boss around my guest to get me coffee, snacks etc. Pretty sweet, I mean they have to get stuff for me. :) I feel better this week than last week. Every time I cross a new bridge with this deal (newest bridge = hair loss) I am forced onto the roller coaster again. I have a hard time when I am sad or upset. It is really frustrating, when I feel sad I think back to the week before when I felt good, when I was happy. I sit there and try to figure out how to get back to feeling good. The answer so far has been simple, time. Time to process what is going on. Time to process how I feel and time to figure out what I can do to make it better. Sometimes there is nothing I can do and somehow in those moments one of my friends sends a text, a card, a package or email to let me know they care. It really ma...
3 comments
Read more

One week to S - Day

Well well well, where has the time gone? I have been busy the past month working, cleaning, and spending time with friends. I have been operating on a semi-normal schedule and have not had to many difficult emotion days. Well at least I don't remember them, Chemo brain is not fun when you are trying to remember important things, but is great when you can't remember the bad days. I still can't sleep like a normal person, which is frustrating, but honestly it is nice to have some consistency in my life. So for those of you who love drama, good news, I am losing it a bit. (Bet you were getting a little bored with the last few blogs, come on, I know you were) The impact of surgery is hitting me. One week, 7 days. I have seven days to wrap up all my work duties, take care of house stuff and prepare to have a 10 hour surgery. Talk about intense pressure. I started crying when watching some of the heartfelt Olympics’ commercials. Heck I cried when I saw the color blue the...
2 comments
Read more