Skip to main content

Here we go again...

So...I have my second surgery scheduled for Feb 2nd. I have not really taken the time to write about it because, well because after an 11 hour massive surgery this 2-3 hour jam is not that intimidating.

I guess my fear with this one is that it could be the last one, which is great but also means I am entering the "this is how you will be" phase of my reconstruction. The past surgery was difficult for many reasons, painful, scary, very permanent in a no turning back way, very emotional as a woman etc. So I have been coping with how I look physically but at the same time knew I had another surgery to refine it all.

I have on the emotional front been enjoying my therapy sessions, trying to come to terms with the past year, and trying to improve my overall emotional health. I am working hard to surround myself with the positive and have a knee jerk reaction to negative settings. This too will balance out with time.

I have in addition, been working on my communication and honesty with myself, my friends and my family. I am trying to be assertive and considerate. All of these things are healthy, just difficult to do sometimes. Especially the honesty part where I have to realize where I am unhealthy and where I have been unfair or reactive to others.

So all in all, I am doing well and still working hard to be a healthy loving person.

The recovery from this surgery is much less time than the first and that is encouraging to me.

I appreciate all the positive vibes, love and prayers you have sent my way - and hopefully will be able to adjust to this next portion of my "cancer experience" without to much struggle.

Peace and Love -
Rosie

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I made a choice.

So I have spent the past few weeks thinking.   Trying to nail down what is most important.  Trying to give myself some perspective.   So I have outlined my worst case scenarios.  Worst case scenario #1:  I don't have the surgery now and end up with cancer in the next few years.   Worst case scenario #2: I have the surgery now and a few years from now I am unhappy and upset that I never had my own biological children.   Worst case scenario #3: I have horrible menopausal symptoms for the next few years.   So. When I write them out.  I see something pretty clear.  #2 and #3 are temporary and there are options for me to work through.   #1 could equal death.  Which is pretty permanent.   So. I'm gonna do it.  That's how I feel right now.  I'm going to chose short term suffering to have a better long term life.   I am trying to read up on things I can do to mitigate menopause that ...
2 comments
Read more

Chemo Round numero dos

What up peeps. I just did my second round of chemo. I actually have fun there. The nurses are so my homies and I made a new friend. His name is Bernie and he is around 65ish. He is funny and his whole family has a great sense of humor. Before I left he made sure that I understood from this point on I must, yes must, save a seat for him next to me. Bernie is my BOY!!! I felt okay right after chemo but about an hour later felt pretty bad. It is hard to describe I guess it feels like a really bad flu that comes out of nowhere. So I took extra nausea meds and pain pills. So although my brain is real real slow, I feel pretty good. The nurses were shocked that I still had hair, and let me know that the hair loss will be increasing over the next week. I plan to have a head shaving party at my house next Fri or Sat. If you are local you are welcome to join the fiesta. I am hoping to be able to shave my head and leave a temporary mohawk. Why you ask? Well if not now, will I really...
2 comments
Read more

One week to S - Day

Well well well, where has the time gone? I have been busy the past month working, cleaning, and spending time with friends. I have been operating on a semi-normal schedule and have not had to many difficult emotion days. Well at least I don't remember them, Chemo brain is not fun when you are trying to remember important things, but is great when you can't remember the bad days. I still can't sleep like a normal person, which is frustrating, but honestly it is nice to have some consistency in my life. So for those of you who love drama, good news, I am losing it a bit. (Bet you were getting a little bored with the last few blogs, come on, I know you were) The impact of surgery is hitting me. One week, 7 days. I have seven days to wrap up all my work duties, take care of house stuff and prepare to have a 10 hour surgery. Talk about intense pressure. I started crying when watching some of the heartfelt Olympics’ commercials. Heck I cried when I saw the color blue the...
2 comments
Read more