Skip to main content

Here we go again...

So...I have my second surgery scheduled for Feb 2nd. I have not really taken the time to write about it because, well because after an 11 hour massive surgery this 2-3 hour jam is not that intimidating.

I guess my fear with this one is that it could be the last one, which is great but also means I am entering the "this is how you will be" phase of my reconstruction. The past surgery was difficult for many reasons, painful, scary, very permanent in a no turning back way, very emotional as a woman etc. So I have been coping with how I look physically but at the same time knew I had another surgery to refine it all.

I have on the emotional front been enjoying my therapy sessions, trying to come to terms with the past year, and trying to improve my overall emotional health. I am working hard to surround myself with the positive and have a knee jerk reaction to negative settings. This too will balance out with time.

I have in addition, been working on my communication and honesty with myself, my friends and my family. I am trying to be assertive and considerate. All of these things are healthy, just difficult to do sometimes. Especially the honesty part where I have to realize where I am unhealthy and where I have been unfair or reactive to others.

So all in all, I am doing well and still working hard to be a healthy loving person.

The recovery from this surgery is much less time than the first and that is encouraging to me.

I appreciate all the positive vibes, love and prayers you have sent my way - and hopefully will be able to adjust to this next portion of my "cancer experience" without to much struggle.

Peace and Love -
Rosie

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I made a choice.

So I have spent the past few weeks thinking.   Trying to nail down what is most important.  Trying to give myself some perspective.   So I have outlined my worst case scenarios.  Worst case scenario #1:  I don't have the surgery now and end up with cancer in the next few years.   Worst case scenario #2: I have the surgery now and a few years from now I am unhappy and upset that I never had my own biological children.   Worst case scenario #3: I have horrible menopausal symptoms for the next few years.   So. When I write them out.  I see something pretty clear.  #2 and #3 are temporary and there are options for me to work through.   #1 could equal death.  Which is pretty permanent.   So. I'm gonna do it.  That's how I feel right now.  I'm going to chose short term suffering to have a better long term life.   I am trying to read up on things I can do to mitigate menopause that ...
2 comments
Read more

Chemo Round numero dos

What up peeps. I just did my second round of chemo. I actually have fun there. The nurses are so my homies and I made a new friend. His name is Bernie and he is around 65ish. He is funny and his whole family has a great sense of humor. Before I left he made sure that I understood from this point on I must, yes must, save a seat for him next to me. Bernie is my BOY!!! I felt okay right after chemo but about an hour later felt pretty bad. It is hard to describe I guess it feels like a really bad flu that comes out of nowhere. So I took extra nausea meds and pain pills. So although my brain is real real slow, I feel pretty good. The nurses were shocked that I still had hair, and let me know that the hair loss will be increasing over the next week. I plan to have a head shaving party at my house next Fri or Sat. If you are local you are welcome to join the fiesta. I am hoping to be able to shave my head and leave a temporary mohawk. Why you ask? Well if not now, will I really...
2 comments
Read more

I'm back...well sorta

Hello everyone, I'm back. Medically speaking I am doing pretty fabulous.  I made it through the surgery.  i am recovering pretty fast and I am able to do a little more each day.  I was surprised by the level of pain I experienced while in the hospital and my first week home. It was much more painful that i imagined, but that is in the past now.  In addition, I did not realize how much after care i would need with my various cuts and stitches, but that too will pass.  My mom has been taking care of me and i know that I would not have made it through this without her. I also realize that I do know myself well and as I suspected this has been the most emotionally difficult part of cancer treatment.  i struggled at times with the chemo and wrapping my head around having cancer but those were minor.  I am trying to slowly deal with everything, but it is very difficult and exhausting.   i am planning to go to NC for a few weeks to recover there.  i don't think I can stand to be...
1 comment
Read more