Skip to main content

oh bloggy blog

Well Well Well - here we are in Dec. My official day back to work is this Wed, I was planning on today being my first day but ran into some issues with doctors notes - so Wed is the day.

I am excited to be going back to work, and continuing to morph back into a normal life schedule. I had a really good thanksgiving week/weekend and all is well - except for my brand new computer (3 months old) totally taking a nose dive on Sat. Hopefully my dad can walk me through how to fix it without having to wipe the entire hard drive. But alas, this is part of owning technology. 

I am still flying pretty high and feel lots of love for lots of people. I guess it turns out that I am a LOVER not a HATER. Hmmm did not see that one coming.

I guess the only thing I have to get out is that I have been cheating on my blog. Yes, I am a cheater. I have spent the past month writing via pen and paper AND in my head. I feel bad because over the past year, blog, you and I have been pretty close and it just seems that I don't really have time for you anymore. I have been tossing and turning at night, trying to find the right words. So here it is - Blog I just need a little space, it's not you - it's me. I mean I don't want you out of my life completely, I just need time to figure somethings out. I hope we can still be friends. 

Well that is all for now, hopefully next time I write you, my heart will be in it more. 

xoxo

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I made a choice.

So I have spent the past few weeks thinking.   Trying to nail down what is most important.  Trying to give myself some perspective.   So I have outlined my worst case scenarios.  Worst case scenario #1:  I don't have the surgery now and end up with cancer in the next few years.   Worst case scenario #2: I have the surgery now and a few years from now I am unhappy and upset that I never had my own biological children.   Worst case scenario #3: I have horrible menopausal symptoms for the next few years.   So. When I write them out.  I see something pretty clear.  #2 and #3 are temporary and there are options for me to work through.   #1 could equal death.  Which is pretty permanent.   So. I'm gonna do it.  That's how I feel right now.  I'm going to chose short term suffering to have a better long term life.   I am trying to read up on things I can do to mitigate menopause that ...
2 comments
Read more

Chemo #3

I had my third chemo session today. My friend Claire went with me. It's nice to have someone there; I dare say a partner in crime. Plus, since I am hooked to a machine, I get to boss around my guest to get me coffee, snacks etc. Pretty sweet, I mean they have to get stuff for me. :) I feel better this week than last week. Every time I cross a new bridge with this deal (newest bridge = hair loss) I am forced onto the roller coaster again. I have a hard time when I am sad or upset. It is really frustrating, when I feel sad I think back to the week before when I felt good, when I was happy. I sit there and try to figure out how to get back to feeling good. The answer so far has been simple, time. Time to process what is going on. Time to process how I feel and time to figure out what I can do to make it better. Sometimes there is nothing I can do and somehow in those moments one of my friends sends a text, a card, a package or email to let me know they care. It really ma...
3 comments
Read more

One week to S - Day

Well well well, where has the time gone? I have been busy the past month working, cleaning, and spending time with friends. I have been operating on a semi-normal schedule and have not had to many difficult emotion days. Well at least I don't remember them, Chemo brain is not fun when you are trying to remember important things, but is great when you can't remember the bad days. I still can't sleep like a normal person, which is frustrating, but honestly it is nice to have some consistency in my life. So for those of you who love drama, good news, I am losing it a bit. (Bet you were getting a little bored with the last few blogs, come on, I know you were) The impact of surgery is hitting me. One week, 7 days. I have seven days to wrap up all my work duties, take care of house stuff and prepare to have a 10 hour surgery. Talk about intense pressure. I started crying when watching some of the heartfelt Olympics’ commercials. Heck I cried when I saw the color blue the...
2 comments
Read more